sur- mis- ing

"Can I help you, Sir? " is often followed by the stammering stumbling "sorry, oh I mean Miss, umm Mame."

I'm not sure which is worse, being "Mammed"being "Missed" or having to deal with the utter embarrassment of the clerk/host/server/elevator operator. I am actually more comfortable hearing the "Sir", recognizing the genderphuck of it all. I slide into it, the comfort and alignment of my butch identity.

The hair on my back actually stands up when I am "Mame-ed", like an assault on my independence, on my masculinity, on my otherness. It conjures up the expectations of behavior associated with the term "Lady" and "Ladylike". What is Ladylike? What is Lady like?

Maybe "sur" is a better term.

sur-¹  a prefix meaning “over, above,” “in addition,”

"Can I help you, Sur?" Afterall, I surve to push you over, above, to think past and in addition to your comfort zone.